it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Randomize
