I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
Randomize
