I'm really into asian looking animals
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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