Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Randomize
