Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
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