I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
There's a naked man in my car right now.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
