After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
