Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
