and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
Randomize