So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
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