3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize
