idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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