I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
