Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
