so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
They have beer where we have blood.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
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