it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
I have all the porn. Be there soon
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