so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
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