I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
i haven't been laid since the bush administration. it's frustrating.
Some advice for success: 1) Go ugly early, it saves you time and money; 2) If you can't pork a princess, pound a pig for practice; and 3) Beauty is only a light switch away.
ur like the dr phil of bizarro world.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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