real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize