Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
Randomize
