super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
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