If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
they call him Oral-B. enough said
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
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