the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Randomize
