btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
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