bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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