I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
