well I can't set my house on fire every night
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
Sorry my hands just texted you
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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