I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
A+ Viking dick
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