someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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