I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Randomize
