break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
You were trust falling into bushes
Randomize
