They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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