and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
