that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Randomize
