they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
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