so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
Randomize
