that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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