butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
Randomize
