who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
well I can't set my house on fire every night
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Randomize
