Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Randomize
