My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
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