My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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