after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
Randomize
