oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
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