I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
