matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
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