I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
