In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Randomize