So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
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