So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
